i'm back for a minute

last time i wrote i had just turned 30....well now i'm 31....that is a while between writings. i think so. it's not that i didn't have anything to write about it's just that i...well ok i didn't have anything to write about. i tried the poems and stories....along with various other ramblings....some of it got a response...but not enough...not to my liking..considering millions of people are on the internet....shit..i feel like i'm wasting my breathe again...as some of you know i'm a painter..not a house painter...a painter of canvas. i'm a bitter motherfucker when it comes to the world of art. i imagine i have had 10 or so shows in the past few years...with each one getting more um....looked forward too....i paint i plan i hang..then the opening happens....i get my ass kissed and told how good i am....that doesn't even do it for me anymore....besides i don't pay attention cause i'm not that good...or i would be fucking rich as hell doing nothing but making painting after painting and counting my money.....at one show someone told me my prices were too low....guess what she didn't buy one...cunt. i mean i make some money....enough to buy some blow and a few rounds for my friends.....then i come home thinking where did all of my money go.///o yeah up my nose. end of transmission.


well i turned 30 today.




cul de sac


kentucky nubbin'
well well...since i haven't written in forever..i think i will update you 10 or so folks that read and look at this rubbish. lets go back to a couple of weeks ago when i had the last art show of my 20's. for i will be hitting 30 next month. lets just say i'm not looking forward to it. not because i'm getting old, but because the goals (which were lofty) that i had set for myself..have barely been reached. anyway back to the art show...which was one of my goals..to sell paintings..which i did ...10 in fact. i made some money,but i wanted to get freakin paid. guess that will happen if i die. who knows i may never paint again. i'm thinking about retiring and doing something else. i want to be an actor...but i'm not sexy enough..plus i'm too fucking shy..guess that is why i paint...or did paint. so anyway even though i'm not looking forward to this 30 thing..i think i'll embrace it and shoot for some change...maybe save money, drink less, stop doing as many drugs as often, semi-manage my diabetes, fall in love(any takers), um move somewhere exciting ( the hills are only fun for so long)...um maybe even exercise. anyway that is boring. this was a fun weekend...i went to the sticks for a family reunion. not my family(we don't have reunions) i went to the evan's family reunion in greenup ky. it was fun fun fun...everyone there plays guitar or banjo or drums or harmonica..etc etc...they don't mess around either...they are pros freaking playing everything from ol' bluegrass to the rock and the roll. my friend joe he's a human radio. he played gram parson's (and the flying burrito bros.) as we sang together. it sounded good...but hell i was wasted. i hadn't drank that much since i went on my senior trip to myrtle beach. get up drink...go to sleep drunk...get up drink...then sleep in the car...anyway is this boring yet? i don't care i had fun...it was good to be around such lovely people. all i know is sonja makes the best couch bed ever..thanks for that...amy she has the best teeth and eyes i've ever seen...honest. robin makes some mean pasta....yes robin you were right i shouldn't have put that spinach in before the onions were carmelized....and joe i shouldn't have said what i said(black girls are my fav...)...if anything i learned to keep my mouth shut...o and jason i'm glad you wore the shirt this year and not me...you make me laugh...anyway i was sad to leave....but i'll be even happier to come back. thanks again
posted by 1975 @ 8:13 AM

j.CEe VEe said...
why don't you tell the mushroom story... i don't know whether to say whee or wooh... but i don't think i have been in the same head space since... and the good lord knows i wasn't that here to begin with!
1:33 PM
Anonymous said...
me neether man...i'm still trying to piece it together and then forget half of that...um we need to do it again earlier and much less shroo,s
9:04 PM
j.CEe VEe said...
much lessindeed!


documentary directed by Johnny depp and gibby hanyes... ."Stuff" is about John Frusciante interested, download it here: http://jftab.free.fr/php/les_commentaires/video2.php3


jake and dinos chapmen









the concept of the next...by:j.c.v.

religions all need confusing and contradictory rules... not that i want a religion or anything.... but if i did... it would go a little like this.... well of course it would vary with my mood... as this does

....so it's time to make the rules to break
... ... legend has the enthusiasm and beauty of a lie with about half the morality.... enemies are rarely as close as they appear, when you are uneasy.... much can be made from a mood, as long as you don't fight it... be highly aware that belonging is just a way to mock the mixture.... contrast is often invented by the ones who intend to show it.... action is not from the source, but the source it's self.... memory is nearly always worthless; better that it fails you than haunts you....
pixilated shall be the only description i can claim for my own.... steep is something someone sold you... dear is more than you can bear.... existence is slang for this shit...style is function minus the flow.... the orange angel can sleep anywhere.... flight is a different kind of fight.... grey eyes are great.... velocity is often as hard to gauge as a girl....penetration is rarely this pretty... posts are for leaning or chopping down.... sickness is something else they sold you on... wisdom is often humorless and full of hate... morning is always too soon... obstacles are employed because it is easier... sad is not just another state like solid.... some things smell really good sometimes....recalling anything is 90% invention, 10% desperation....religion is funny and all but the religious are down right scary.... all joints shall be passed to the left.... conventions are for Shriners, we will stick with habits... there are way too many breakfast cereals... prepare for nothing until you are absolutely forced into doing so.... none of us mind being objectified as long as we are not typecast.... understanding is laughable.... detachment is only a dream... indiscretions are some of our most noble acts... tranquility is the bastard son of boredom... ghosts are not real(see any scooby doo episode) but they are fun to believe in while it is dark out... plain is rarely plaid.... injury is respected above ability... never drink beer after drinking wine(trust me)... birds are luckier than you and i, as they can fly... quill pens are coming back...the non-erratic’s is a good name for a band but it is taken already so don't even think about it.... dispute all instructions... inspect it all thoroughly before you leave... thousand island contains ketchup... using the _expression "tits mahogany" implies something is the shit.... there is much to be said but little meaning will be obtained....
competition is for kids… criticism has never been worth anything and shall never attain that lofty position(the fucks that say otherwise just want to bitch because hate and or love themselves way too much for this world to normally take)…

and finally

the bill of ripe(maxims that the mood made)

1.the greatest strength sometimes is found in shutting up...especially for j#3.
2.there is really only one way to test out a bed.
3.jumping off or on is easier than going around... but not as scenic.
4.both waiting and wanting can wear your ass out.
5.acclaim announces it’s self with it's stench... and embraces us all in it's reckoning.
6.people with absolutely nothing at all are able to celebrate anything better.
7.the way to accomplish maxim # 2 does NOT involve sleeping in any form or fashion.
8.we are all designed alike initially... something magical happens along the way... hopefully.
9.blessings are often ignored.... even the best ones.
10.excess only rots and rots... (even the finest fabric)
11.brave people don't take things from people who need them.
12.the taste of truth can take some getting used to... just like the dark .... or dark beer.
13.it is better to see the wrong than to trip over yourself committing it in the dark.
14.the harsher the climate... the more beautiful and complex the protection provided will be.
15.use pens when you aren't sure... pencils when you are very.
16.tact holds little weight; when it gets another person killed.
17.ornaments aren't always seen as such. this is both right and wrong.
18.all of our aims are a little off... i'm afraid.
19.dazzle and daze all decay.
20.it is easy to make up 20 silly statements... just hard as hell to remember them later.



jack and jill:bill santen and me:steven

Collaborations + Catalysts
May 13 - June 24, 2005
Opening Preview
Friday, May 13 from 6-9pm
Loudoun House, Free Admission
�Our support for each other in our creative pursuits is essential; our abundance is large; our impact is contagious; and our art is a powerful and a much-needed antidote to the times.��Charles Jolly, Visual Arts Committee Chair
Collaborations + Catalysts marks a change in the Lexington Art League�s Members Open; it is the first time that the LAL has set a theme, or direction, regarding the work that is exhibited in the Open. The goal of Collaborations + Catalysts is to challenge our artist members to work in a new way, reaching beyond their safety net. The LAL encouraged artists to work collaboratively, or to seek out a catalyst as a strong influence on their artwork.
Collaborations + Catalysts is part of a broader movement within Lexington to recognize what is good within our arts community, while continually striving towards excellence. The central point in all of the discussions for this exhibit was that artists need the support of the community and other artists. With Collaborations + Catalysts, the LAL attends to the needs of artists, and encourages the artists amongst us to join in our commitment to excellence.
Gallery Hours:
Tuesday - Sunday, 1-4pm
Free Admission


these are the ladies i spoke of below. the old lady who molested me is not in the picture. the girl to the far right asked my friend the guitar player if he wanted to get fucked hard. they are straight foward in walton. this was really taken few a week ago..looks like the 80's eh?


me drunk playing air guitar and smoking. for those of you whom asked where and when and what: it was taken last weekend at a honkey tonk called tradewinds in walton ky(it's on the way to cincy)anyway my friend mike is in a band that played there...so i went. shortly after this picture was taken a few not so hot redneck girls surrounded me and began to sandwich me. before i knew i was dancing with some 65 year old woman that put her hands up my shirt then grabbed my ass and rubbed my package. that was one of the craziest things that has ever happened to me. so she did all that and her friends pulled her off while she screamed i love you love you

"Quotes are nothing but inspiration for the uninspired." -Richard Kemph

“that guy just said that so people would quote him…”-Jonathan Clayton Vincent


"I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours." Hunter S. Thompson


click HERE for cricket press!

buy this and other great posters from my friends at cricket press! they kick poster ass!


Every child is an artist, the problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. -Pablo Picasso

They are ill discoverers who think there is no land, when they can see nothing but sea.- Francis Bacon


guess who?


my guitar arrived today! i'm stoked



Diabetic Morrison leads Zags against Texas Tech

By BETH HARRIS, AP Sports WriterMarch 19, 2005
AP - Mar 19, 6:40 pm ESTMore PhotosTUCSON, Ariz. (AP) -- Coach Mark Few called a timeout in the first half of Gonzaga's first-round NCAA tournament game against Winthrop. The Zags were struggling and he was mad.
Adam Morrison listened to Few yelling out changes as he checked his blood sugar level. It was high, so the sophomore lifted his jersey and stuck a needle filled with insulin into his stomach. The horn blew, signaling the teams back into action.
``That kid is as tough as tough is,'' Few said Friday. ``He bounces right back out on the floor, bangs in a couple jumpers and moves on.''
The third-seeded Zags (26-4) did, too, advancing to Saturday's game against No. 6 seed Texas Tech (21-10) for a spot in the Albuquerque Regional. No. 3 seed Oklahoma (25-7) takes on sixth-seeded Utah (28-5) in the day's second game with the winner advancing to the Austin Regional semifinals.
Morrison was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes as a 13-year-old in his hometown of Spokane, Wash., where Gonzaga is located. About 1 million people in the United States have the disease, which can cause heart attacks, vision problems and early death.
``When it came to sports, I was scared and I didn't know how to deal with the disease,'' he said. ``That's the biggest myth of the disease; people think you're limited in athletics. You are in some aspects, but if you have control of it, you're not limited.''
Morrison uses an insulin pump to monitor his blood sugar every 30 minutes, whether he's at practice or in a game. If it's low, he eats something or grabs a high-sugar sports drink. If it's high, he gives himself a shot. A couple hours before games, he eats two 5-ounce steaks, a baked potato and peas.
He scored 27 points and played all but a minute of Gonzaga's 74-64 win over Winthrop. He typically plays 30 or more minutes a game.
``He is an unbelievable inspiration and role model for all the kids out there that have been diagnosed with this,'' Few said. ``You don't have to shut down your life. You can participate in any sports you want or do anything you want to do. Hopefully, that's the message that is getting out.''
Morrison's disease affects his teammates and the coaching staff. He misses portions of every practice to check his blood sugar so he doesn't go into shock. Depending on the level, he may sit down and rest.
That didn't go over well at first with the other players.
``Guys are sweating, fighting, scratching and clawing and Adam is over there chomping on an energy bar and drinking some apple juice,'' Few said. ``You can see where your teammates can get a little frustrated, but they have been unbelievably supportive of him. They became educated on it as we all have been, myself included.''
Unlike a lot of college kids, Morrison has to watch his diet and stay away from excessive junk food and sugary snacks. That's where his teammates help out.
``I usually eat the candy bar for him,'' center Ronny Turiaf said, laughing.
Morrison has emerged this season as a star on Gonzaga's team. He's easily recognizable, with his shaggy dark hair.
AP - Mar 18, 4:55 pm ESTMore PhotosMorrison had 26 points and 11 rebounds in an 89-72 loss against then-No. 5 Illinois in November. He scored a career-high 30 points in the West Coast Conference tournament title game against Saint Mary's.
``If I were a fan or not a coach with a vested interest, I would really enjoy watching him play,'' Texas Tech coach Bob Knight said.
Growing up in Gonzaga's hometown, Morrison never wanted to attend college anywhere else. Of course, no other schools recruited him, either.
Few recalled the first time he saw Morrison play in high school. The coach noticed Morrison's awkward gait, his unique style of shooting the ball from behind his head and a lack of effort on defense. Few was at first unimpressed.
``My assistant called and asked how he looked and asked how many points he scored at halftime,'' the coach said. ``I picked up the stat sheet and he had 30. I said, `We might have something here.'''
Indeed, the Zags do.


in honor and memory of a friend...i'll never forget you or your smile ;)

Douglas Mark Weinberg

WEINBERG, Douglas Mark, 29, died Sun., March 13, 2005, in Hemet, CA, as a result of a pulmonary embolus. Douglas was preceded in death by his mother Lauren Weinberg. Survivors are his father Harold; his brother, Brian; his grandfather, Aaron; Harold's wife, Claire Schmelzer Weinberg; her children Erika Schmelzer Webb and Stephen Schmelzer; and many other loving family members and friends. Born in Lexington, KY, Doug was named a National Merit Semifinalist while at Lafayette High School. He graduated from the University of Kentucky with honors in anthropology and began a career in archeology in Belize. Most recently, Doug was Field Director and Principal Supervisor of the Belize Valley Archeological Reconnaissance Macal River Project. As such, Doug oversaw the reconnaissance and excavation of Mayan archeological sites deep in the rain forest of the Macal River Valley in western Belize. Doug's final report on the project has sparked public debate over the construction of the Chalillo hydroelectric dam which threatens to flood these sites (hundreds, perhaps thousands still undiscovered) and destroy a primary nesting habitat for the endangered Scarlet Macaw. As an archeologist for the Belize Tourism Development Project, Doug helped oversee the excavation and restoration of Belize's most stunning Mayan structures, including temples, at Altun Ha and Caracol; both sites were recently featured in American Archeology and have vitalized Belize's tourism industry. In the January 2005 issue of Toyota Trails, Doug wrote of his drive from Belize to KY in his 1987 Land Cruiser, a truck he completely rebuilt. At the time of his death, Doug was working in archeology and cultural resources management in California while researching graduate schools; he wanted to use his experience as a field director for a humanitarian cause: international aid and relief. Doug's intelligence, knowledge, resourcefulness, empathy, generosity, and sense of humor made him a strong leader in his professional life and a treasured friend to many. To everyone who loved Doug, perhaps the sites at Altun Ha and Caracol can stand, at least in part, as monuments to Doug's work as an archeologist and his indomitable spirit. An "online memorial" is being constructed at www.weinberg.org/dmw. Memorial contributions may be sent to The Lauren K. Weinberg Fund at the Bluegrass Community Foundation, 200 West Vine Street, Suite 205, Lexington, KY, 40507. Visitation will be on Mon., March 21, 2005, from 12 - 1:30 pm at Temple Adath Israel. Services will follow at 2 pm. Burial will be at the Lexington Cemetery. www.milwardfuneral.com

squier(by fender) telecaster custom

A value-priced(for my broke azz) version of a classic Tele® design.
This limited-run Tele fuses design elements from two of most popular Telecasters: a '72 Tele Custom and a Tele Deluxe.

the Features(a swell band too) of this guitar are as follows: Agathis body, maple neck with maple fretboard, 25-1/2" scale length, medium-jumbo frets, and 2 humbuckers with independent controls.
What is Agathis? Agathis is the name for a genus of GIANT tropical conifer trees found in rain forests in the tropical far east and the southwest Pacific. The genus is a member of the Araucariaceae, the plant family which includes the monkey-puzzles and Cook-pines as well as the recently discovered Wollemi Pine, a botanical "living fossil" from New South Wales in Australia. The Araucariaceae belongs to a group of plants known as the conifers, which also includes the pine family (pines, spruces, larches, firs, cedars), the podocarp family (podocarps, kahikatea, totara, etc.) and the cypress family (swamp-cypresses, giant sequoias, junipers & cypresses). The timber is immensely useful and is increasingly used, or so it would seem, for making guitars.
it should be in my hands by the middle of next week. just one more reason for me to stay locked in my room. not to mention about 200 reasons to go to work. i've been sleeping w/my gibson acoustic..i may kick her out of the bed for a few nights when this ol' gal gets into town.
i'm sorry if my guitar was part of the destruction of rainforest. if by some crazy chance i make a load of money with it or by any other means. i'll plant 679 more trees in the rainforest to replace the one they took out to make this guitar. o the maple trees..mmm maple syrup.. i forgot about the maple. i will plant some maple trees too! pinky swear


art and copyrights

Under the law established by the Berne Convention, original works of art are automatically copyrighted to their authors. That means you have the right to display, reproduce, create derivative works, sell or license, and take credit for authorship of your work. This applies in all countries that have signed up for the law- there are a few exceptions, such as Taiwan. Currently, copyrights last 70 years past the owner's lifetime before they revert to 'public domain.'


Long ago, in Tibet, there was a ceremony, held every hundred years. Buddhist students, Tibetan priests-and the Dalai Lama would line up. They would begin the ceremony by saying: "This is the ceremony of the Room of 1,000 Demons. It is a ceremony of enlightenment, and it happens only once every hundred years. If you choose not to go through it now, you will have to wait another hundred years. To help make this decision, we'll tell you what the ceremony involves."In order to enter the Room of 1,000 Demons, you just open the door and walk in. The Room of 1,000 Demons is not very big. Once you enter, the door will close behind you. There is no door knob on the inside of the door. In order to get out, you will have to walk all the way through the room, find the door on the other side, open the door (which is unlocked), and come out. Then you will be enlightened."The room is call the Room of 1,000 Demons because there are one thousand demons in there. Those demons have the ability to take the form of your worst fears. As soon as you walk into the room, those demons show you your worst fears. If you have a fear of heights, when you walk into the room it will appear as if you are standing on a narrow ledge of a tall building. If you have a fear of spiders, you'll be surrounded by the most terrifying eight-legged creatures imaginable. Whatever your fears are, the demons take those images from your mind and seem to make them real. In fact, they'll be so compellingly real that it will be very difficult to remember that they're not."We can't come in and rescue you. That is the part of the rules. If you go into the Room of 1,000 Demons, you must leave it on your own. Some people never leave. They go into the room and become paralyzed with fright. They stay trapped in the room until they die. If you want to take the risk of entering the room, that's fine. If you don't, if you want to go home, that's fine. You don't have to enter the room. You can wait until you are incarnated again, come back in another hundred years, and try it again."If you want to enter the room, we have two hints for you. The first hint: As soon as you enter the room, remember that what they show you isn't real. It's all from your own mind. Don't buy into it; it's an illusion. Of course, most of the people who went into the room before you couldn't remember that. This idea is very difficult to keep in mind."The second hint has been more helpful for the people who made it out the other side and became enlightened. Once you go into the room, no matter what you see, no matter what you feel, no matter what you hear, no matter what you think, keep your feet moving."If you keep your feet moving, you will eventually get to the other side, find the door, and come out." -Author Unknown


I finally...

got a job. I once promised myself that I would never work in the restaurant industry again,but when cooking is the only thing I can put on my application then what else am I to do? So the wait has paid off. I start my new job tomorrow at the fanciest place in this small town. I'll be working the lunch shift:making the various salads and desserts. Then when I'm not doing that I'll be doing some prep for the supper shift. I'm a little nervous because the chef was trained at the Culinary Institute of America(also known in the culinary world as the C.I.A)... I hope he teaches me loads of new techniques and tricks. More than anything I hope he pays me well, because I've already made a mental note of the things I'm going to purchase. Since mine was stolen:a new electric guitar-an orange fender toronado. Orange toronados are hard to find,because that color has been discontinued. You have no idea how hard it is to find an orange guitar. I did find an acrylic (clear) one with an orange tint. it was a cheapo, but it was a neato. I think that is all I want. O wait...Maybe I'll get myself a hooker or three. Two black ones and an Asian or Caucasian. It's been a while..Plus I'm kind of lonely. Just kidding I have never been with a hooker, maybe a few sluts,, butt no hookers. Oh I know what else I want: a record player and some software that allows me to burn DVD's. Maybe I'll buy myself some new clothes since everything I own either has paint on it,a hole in it,or both. Well that is all I can think of for now. I hope all is well.


sometimes you just have to put an end to things.

I think Hunter had the right idea and i don't fault him for his choice. This world sucks and isn't showing any signs of getting much better. I'm hoping and wishing that he's left behind a brilliant thought provoking suicide note/letter/essay. If not,then he's missed a damn good oppurtunity to ruffle some more of the right-wing feathers:which he had such an incredible knack for doing. On the other hand,maybe he didn't need to write a suicide note/letter/essay at all. Perhaps his silence says it all and provokes even more thought. but thankfully his words will be here forever...i insist that you read them! if you are a writer:learn from him..but don't even try to write like him. Folks have been trying to do this for years. readers and teachers will see right through you. he's gone(and on his own terms) but never forgotten!


I hate when...

Folks are talking about how they turned
their lives around and made things much better.
they often misuse the expression I did a 360* w/my life.
anyone with half of a brain should be able to
realize that a 360*... Gets you right back where
started..Hence you have not changed.
For those of you who don't know, if you have changed
your life completely it's called doing a 180*. I'm aware
that the few readers I have are already in the know.
Please..let this be a reminder to you to correct
anyone you catch saying they did a 360*
that they in fact did a 180*. Basketball players are exempt
from the 360* bashing..As a matter of fact you should
probably complement them on their game...Maybe
boy I remember when you couldn't do that 360*.
you really did a 180* with your game..When you pulled
off the 360*.
O...I forgot...skateboarders you are also
exempt-hell you do 720*s and 900*s...I guess 360*s are so

lame now...Shit and figureskaters and surfers
Um.. if you think of anyone else...add em!

I also hate when people say: "that is real nice..."
"she is real pretty" Folks it is "she is really nice...Or
"that is really nice.." I mean the opposite of "real nice"
makes more sense..."She is fake nice.." Anyway
it's been a real long time since I last wrote. ha
I mean: it's been a really long time since I last wrote..
so I thought I would do some really real writing.

until next time keep it real...i'm trying however
i'm several degrees away from my 180*..



Ernest Hemingway Mario Puzo H.G. Wells Arthur Ashe Ty Cobb James"Buster"Douglas(kicked mike tyson's ass) "Smokin'Joe Fraiser Catfish Hunter Jackie Robinson Sugar Ray Robinson Adolph Rupp Johnny Cash Carol Channing David Crosby MommaCass Elliot Freddy Fender Ella Fitzgerald Mick Fleetwood Jerry Garcia Dizzy Gilespi Tiny Tim Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan B.B. King Mahalia Jackson Waylon Jennings Patti Labelle Peggy Lee Andrew Lloyd Webber Loretta Lynn Elvis Presley Neil Young Jack Benny Halle Berry(hottest diabetic) Wilfred Brimley Delta Burke James Cagney Nell Carter Jackie Gleason George Lucas Mary Tyler Moore Minnie Pearl Elizabeth Taylor Spencer Tracy Mae West Thomas Edison Bill and John Davidson(Harley-DavidsonMotorcycles) Howard Hughes Paul Cezanne

Elda Bani -- South African Anti-apartheid Detainee Gerald Birnbaum -- Medical Doctor Imposter Blondin -- first person to cross Niagara Falls on a tightrope Ron Brown -- 1st Employee of June Bierman's Sugar Free Center Ralph Bunch -- Nobel Peace Prize Winner, U.N. Diplomat Steven Craig -- 1st recipient, Vivorex Co. islet cell transplant Jeanne-Marie Gagneux -- Marijuana Smuggler John Grant -- Social Worker, longest-lived diabetic Tim Hildebrandt -- Illustrator, Star Wars promotional posters Trevor Huddlestone -- Angelican Bishop Cardinal John Krol -- Roman Catholic Archbishop, Confidant, Pope John Paul II Madalyn Murray O'Hair -- Famous U.S. Aetheist Jimmy "The Greek" -- Las Vegas, NV Oddsmaker Magnolia Thunderpussy -- '60s Restaurateur Helen Waterford -- Nazi Holocaust Survivor Steven Garrett Holbrook--painter/poet/pauper

blog this suckas!



27in x 20in acrylic on wood...for sale/best offer

My First Big Concert...What a thriller!

It was 1984...I was 8 years old and Michael Jackson was pre-WACKO/JACKO. My dad-mom-sister-aunt-cousin and 85 year old papaw all piled in the van(singing and dancing the whole time) and headed for Knoxville TN. The JACKSONS were no longer the Jackson 5..Because they had added randy:who was too young to be in the J5. This was my first exposure to lasers and lots of black girls. It was amazingly amazing..They did the old J5 songs..Then... Michael sang some of his songs(beat it-Billie Jean-Thriller-Don't stop till you get enough-Rock with you...) School started a few days later. My teacher asked us to share our summer adventures with the class. You should have seen their reactions when I said "I went to see Michael Jackson" even the teacher's jaw dropped. Remember this was in 1984...Before... Well.. You know. I'm kind of ashamed to admit it..But for the longest time..In the event of a house fire... I kept my duffel bag(which I got at pizza hut during the trip)that had my Jacksons souvenirs and my baseball cards
on top of my television...So I could grab it and jump out the window...Fortunately the fire never happened. The duffel bag is long gone.. However the souvenirs and the baseball cards are tucked away somewhere in my parents attic.


vegan porn


What is DaDa?

Perhaps Strange

The world is full of goods trains
The passengers are cows
And milk and butter.
And cheese and lovely marmelade
And bulls and horses,
And cocks and hens.
The cow is mother to the milk,
And grandma both to cheese and butter.
The cheese is cousin to the marmelade.
The horse is cousin to the cock
The hen lays eggs.
The egg is cousin to the cheese and butter,
The son and daughter of the milk.
Isn't it strange?
It is.

Kurt Schwitters

can you spot the irony?


So you want to be a writer?

if it doesn't come bursting out of you
in spite of everything,
don't do it.
unless it comes unasked out of your
heart and your mind and your mouth
and your gut,
don't do it.
if you have to sit for hours
staring at your computer screen
or hunched over your
searching for words,
don't do it.
if you're doing it for money or
don't do it.
if you're doing it because you want
women in your bed,
don't do it.
if you have to sit there and
rewrite it again and again,
don't do it.
if it's hard work just thinking about doing it,
don't do it.
if you're trying to write like somebody
forget about it.

if you have to wait for it to roar out of
then wait patiently.
if it never does roar out of you,
do something else.
if you first have to read it to your wife
or your girlfriend or your boyfriend
or your parents or to anybody at all,
you're not ready.

don't be like so many writers,
don't be like so many thousands of
people who call themselves writers,
don't be dull and boring and
pretentious, don't be consumed with self-
the libraries of the world have
yawned themselves to
over your kind.
don't add to that.
don't do it.
unless it comes out of
your soul like a rocket,
unless being still would
drive you to madness or
suicide or murder,
don't do it.
unless the sun inside you is
burning your gut,
don't do it.

when it is truly time,
and if you have been chosen,
it will do it by
itself and it will keep on doing it
until you die or it dies in

there is no other way.

and there never was.

charles bukowski

taken at my favorite flea market!


click here for some bill...

bill santen:the latest next-ist

shorted on symbols

as transparent as the lucky; in lucubration
all this time is just a means to test the endurance
similarly threaded with it's own promise and despair
an interuption of all that endless articulation and arrogance
filled to the limits with the the originator; the all of every
instruments grow flat then mostly mute though
organized they end up lost all those things
attached in this worldcan not see beyond this want

j.vincent:fellow next-ist
and future godfather
to any children i might
ever have.

"all but one is gone"

"cull her"

william s. burroughs cut-up machine

have true all and a need it's file bump dough sure
this and the of we bubbles beware the like is exits
free bitch you meat race the drum clothes while
we eat him exist dropped video those bark folks

dogs the moment captured progressive we into gravy
the real like the wasn't in with three know there
keep whispers heads hell for below a pause want
more it folks ground about more done turns

moron we if food grief hear platinum how
tears can even help is bark good torture folks
dogs out the night wakes in to rewind rewind moments

captured poor big lens progressive

cash even we no into it's bubbles beware folks
gravy the light smoothering no eager the
bump real under our like into lifeless the
forward fast is want more idiot don't left

rotting buy radioactive bump building vote
the beware years swell rain down who's kids
human cash into real the shock never of
and over full left that teeth skin lovely folded

the buttered bread good out night wakes above
to poor lens it even no it's folks light
smoothering eager our into life less forward

fast want more him bite fall afraid a please

failing here...please selves plastic want more
if delivery lots when lens even light
smoothering bump our heroes around we and

for a the rolling from make crushed between for

kisses and is of charge so noone covered even of
more help it you the so noone so bark can
good covered torture even folks
dogs of out more the help night wakes

it in charge above you moments captured


the shadow of death

does anyone want to kiss me?


the history of inspiration

mark kostabi


alas a mess story

shiver the star does
when it runs out of
gases like a car wounded
in traffic or a puppy
mangled for a life
time buy some protection
four in a row died tragic
folks died two leaving
nothing but hopelessness
behind which i suppose that
is something being that it
is a being that is very much
wanting and wading through
to get to the top of the
bottom of the misery it
has known nothingness
cradled forever buy a strong
force field a pungent odor
permeating the post you know
when that day that was long
ago witch one they were all
bad very few good ones in
the mean time being overly
appreciated for their own
reluctance breathing deeper but
not better chocking on the vomit
that came from the vomitorium
i grew up in a world of mercy
now I'll die in a world of despair
disappear i hope i do when the
load is heavy and fear is the least
of our worries get in line the lions
are hungry waiting to chomp at
the bit drill bit cutting holes in
the atmosphere will let the air
out and the space in clambering
colorlessly for nothingness
again caged in by the cataclysmic
results of a reluctant pursuit of
probably daydreams focusing on
being paranoid instead of pride
void of voice and misconstruing
meandering meagerly for a moment
the momentum is slowing as we
are growing older some wiser
some shrinking thinking not much
left too rot like the sandwich you
got and didn't like spit it out
for the ants extra change feeling
your pants gets you there but
not home i have no home rome
when in doubt it's cold remedy is
close figuring for the most least
you could do is be aware settle down
somewhere not there anywhere but
there closing in on the mark
missing it buy a mile for litters
sake make it your row front
row were it is loudest you can
get spit on like the side walk
in the place you like the least


my stolen guitar in the background..i miss you little buddy...

exiting that show

picture of a picture of one of my paintings from the aforementioned show...the middle is fabric..then they let me paint behind it on the wall...

picture of a picture of me taking a picture of one of my shows

picture of a picture of a painting

simple already simplified